Wednesday, June 26, 2013

Happy Birthday Amay!

As life continues to get busy, it has become extremely hard to write posts when they are due....Amay's birthday was June 22nd and we had a wonderful day.  A week before, I talked to him about his birthday:

Me: Amay, your birthday is coming up.  Do you know what that means?
Amay: Yes, I am going back to India!
Me:  Why would you go back to India?
Amay: I am going to go see my other mom?
Me: Amay, you know we don't know where she is, right. But if you ever did get a chance to meet her, what would you do or say?
Amay: I just want to say Hi and give her a hug, BUT then I am coming right back to YOU!
Me: (holding back tears) I'm happy you will come back to me.

As this year passes for him and our whole family, there is not much more to say but that we celebrate Amay's birth into this world.  I am so happy to be his mother and though I often mourn the biological absence, I am blessed to have him in my life.  My husband used to tell me that there was a song that reminded him of Amay when he listened to it when Amay first came to America..  And now, this song has become Amay's story.  When my heart becomes heavy for him, I listen to this song.  So on his birthday, I thought about my Amay and this song.  "Nothing is given except the ties that hold us together, Lay down your Load, because everyday it's gonna grow.....You are shielded by the hands of love"


Fearful child have faith in brighter days,
Stay until this darkness fades away,
Lie still beside me, I'll hold you now, I'll hold you forever.
Winters hand will freeze your heart again,
Doors will close no time to start again,
Nothing is given except the ties that hold us together,
Lay down your Load, because everyday it's gonna grow,
And busk in the sunshine, try to pay no mind, try to pay no mind at all,
To all the things that you don't know, you've got time to realise,
You're shielded by the hands of love,
Cause you are young,
Fading light may make a fool of me,
Courage fails strength slips away from me,
Lie still beside me, and hold me now, and hold me forever.
Lay down your Load, because everyday it's gonna grow,
These days are sacred, hey now don't be scared, baby don't be scared at
All,
Of all the things that you don't know,
You've got time to realise, You're shielded by the hands of love,
Cause you are young,
You've got time you gotta try, to bring some good into this world,
Cause you are young, Cause you are young
Ohhh...
Cause you are young


Happy Birthday to my son.  Thank you for letting me be your mom and for giving me time to learn to be perfect for you.  I love you and I promise to shield you by the hands of love.